rain,pups and the ex...what a combo
10.11.06 (7:39 pm) [edit]its almost bedtime and its raining pretty good...the pups seem 2 be ok so far with the storm...hope all goes well...today was a good day...alittle pain but for the most part it was good...went shopping with jim and his dad and sister and his brother in-law..then we had lunch nice day...today bill had gotten the kids after school...i have a schedule i keep the kids on during school....showers at 7 and in bed by 8...by 9 they r sleeping...tonight was all messed up they did not get home until 8...bill just gave me attitude like i have no say in how i have things here...my oldest told me that his dad yelled at him during homework time...my son scott has a learning disablity he is very smart but something goes wrong...its like he just forgets everything...well of course bill would not know how 2 study with him beings he never gets his kids nor does he attend meetings at the school...something i do not keep him from he just choices not 2 be there....then he has the nerve 2 call and ask if we study with him....god this man has no idea what we do here for the kids...i am sorry but my kids get A's and B's i think we do very well for them...as for scott i am so involved in finding ways 2 help him...like jim and scott's teacher...his teacher is wonderful i could not ask for anymore...but its just funny how he can call me and tell me all the wrongs but never says hey u r doin great for our kids...i talked with bill's sister-law tonight cause i was tryin 2 reach them for i wanted them home 2 get settled for the night...she had told me that bill is engaged and they r planning a summer wedding....well this is wonderful news these means i get my wish....finally.....mary which is bill's sister-law can not stand the fact he is getting married and is rather pissed at bill for how he treats his kids...and she told me tonight that i am doing an amazing job with the kids and keep doin what i am doin...god i hope so...i really hope i am doin a good job....tomorrow is open house and the kids asked there dad if he is going of course he can not....says its the school's fault for having it on a thursday....yep always someone else's fault...never bill's fault....oh well of course i am going and jim and my mother...the people who stand behind them always...i always say maybe someday bill will learn...but i waited 11yrs and it never happened...i just hope my kids do not let 11yrs go by and let it happen 2 them.....well i need 2 get rest work in the am...
pain,sundays and little about the pups
10.08.06 (8:09 pm) [edit]lets see i had 2 days off and what did i do..nothing...it totally sucks i have been in so much pain..i really thought i found the right drug 2 help and make me feel better but it worked for a month and now i am back 2 square one...i know i am going down a long path and i have alot 2 go through but i am just so damn tired...i would give anything 2 be able 2 wake and not be tired or worn out or hurting...i try 2 hide it at times but i know jim can see right through me...i mean we r the couple who finish each others sentences and know what each other is thinking...work is killing me and i keep that 2 myself..i do not want 2 give in...but i hurt each day i go..
sundays...i feel bad each sunday wondering if bill will come and get the kids...he calls this morning the kids where dress and waiting 2 call him 2 have him pick them up...but he called instead 2 let them know he would not be getting them this sunday either...2 sundays in a row..for he had a bike run instead and that was more important...the sound of there voices when they talked with him brought tears 2 my eyes and i told them it was ok and that do not let there father make them cry...jim felt bad so he told them 2 go and get there colored paper and he would help them make ghost and pumpkins,witches,bats for halloween they enjoyed that..sometimes i wish they did not have 2 deal with bill...but i know they have 2 make that decison in life...but i am there mother and a mother does not want 2 see there babies hurt...
puppies...chanook and cena r doin so well i am proud....they potty outside and have not made a mess in the house...only cena used my cupboard handle as a chew toy...ughhhhh...not 2 happy with him but puppies do that...so i got that no chew spray...ummmm my dog cena loves the shit he licks it....they got there first bath today that was funny...of course jim's dog chanook was perfect...my dog on the other hand was a mess lol...he was so scared and lets just say i think jim had more water on him then the dog lol...but ever since we got the dogs jim's been enjoying himself...he had 2 dogs before that he had 2 put 2 sleep and it was hard on him and it still bothers him today...he always talks about them as if they r still here...now i see him playing with the puppies and enjoying himself its nice 2 see him smile and have fun....
thats all i want for my family is fun and smiles and love
new fun love in the house
10.04.06 (8:03 pm) [edit]hmmm alot has been going on these passed days or weeks...jim's kids came over this weekend and it was nice 2 see them....i got the biggest shock when dakota was going home he said i love u...i have been tryin with him alot...like pickin on him and stuff where he comes after me lol...as for marissa of course she was stuck by my side like always...but do not tell anyone i actually love it...i wish marissa was my daughter...the funny thing about it all is she looks like me lol...my daughter is growing up so fast and i just want 2 keep her my little girl for as long as i can...scary thought of her becoming a lady soon...well we added 2 our family we adopted 2 puppies...they r 3 months old sherpard with chow....2 boys...we named them chanook...and cena..cena is mine...he gets into everything lol...chanook is jim's of course and he is the boss...but its going really well...they r brothers also....i was told when we adotped them that they where thrown into a sew drain when they where born...there was 6 of them 3 survived...that is a sad thought how could someone do such a thing..i will try 2 put there pics up if i can lol...
as for me i have been in pain for the last 4 days...which pretty sucks major ass...i am now takin 2 pills 2 sleep...which does not feel like i get sleep cause i am still very drain when i wake...but it does not help when i have this pain...it is rough 2 go 2 work and stand on my feet for 9 hours...but what am i 2 do...ugh enough about my pain....
so the kids and jim put the halloween things up that looks very cute...now i have 2 have my dad make 2 more ghost since he has my kids name on there ghost i have 2 have dakota and marissa well sleepin pills r kickin in so i need 2 sleep..
